## Kiddushin Daf 41a

###### Kiddushin 41a:1
[Kiddushin 41a:1](https://torahapp.org/share/book/Kiddushin/r/41a:1)

לֹא עָלְתָה בְּיָדוֹ אֶלָּא רַגְזָנוּתָא. וּלְאָדָם טוֹב מַטְעִימִים אוֹתוֹ מִפְּרִי מַעֲשָׂיו. וְכֹל שֶׁאֵינוֹ לֹא בַּמִּקְרָא וְלֹא בַּמִּשְׁנָה וְלֹא בְּדֶרֶךְ אֶרֶץ – דּוֹר הֲנָאָה מִמֶּנּוּ, שֶׁנֶּאֱמַר: ״וּבְמוֹשַׁב לֵצִים לֹא יָשָׁב״ – מוֹשָׁבוֹ מוֹשַׁב לֵצִים.

**William Davidson Edition - English:**
**has managed** to acquire **only anger [*ragzanuta*],** i.e., nothing beneficial comes through anger; in the end he is left with nothing but the anger itself. **And a good person is given the fruit of his actions to taste. And** with regard to **any** person **who does not engage in** the study of **Bible, nor** the study of **Mishna, nor** the **desired mode of behavior,** one should **vow to not** derive **benefit from him,** and one should have no contact with him, **as it is stated: “Nor sat in the seat of the scornful”** (Psalms 1:1). The **seat** of this person is certainly the **seat of the scornful,** as he is engaged in nothing but idle matters.


###### Kiddushin 41a:2
[Kiddushin 41a:2](https://torahapp.org/share/book/Kiddushin/r/41a:2)

**הֲדַרַן עֲלָךְ הָאִשָּׁה נִקְנֵית**


###### Kiddushin 41a:3
[Kiddushin 41a:3](https://torahapp.org/share/book/Kiddushin/r/41a:3)

**הָאִישׁ מְקַדֵּשׁ** בּוֹ וּבִשְׁלוּחוֹ. הָאִשָּׁה מִתְקַדֶּשֶׁת בָּהּ וּבִשְׁלוּחָהּ. הָאִישׁ מְקַדֵּשׁ אֶת בִּתּוֹ כְּשֶׁהִיא נַעֲרָה, בּוֹ וּבִשְׁלוּחוֹ.

**William Davidson Edition - English:**
**MISHNA:** **A man can betroth** a woman **by himself or by** means of **his agent.** Similarly, **a woman can become betrothed by herself or by** means of **her agent. A man can betroth his daughter** to a man **when she is a young woman,** either **by himself or by** means of **his agent.**


###### Kiddushin 41a:4
[Kiddushin 41a:4](https://torahapp.org/share/book/Kiddushin/r/41a:4)

**גְּמָ׳** הַשְׁתָּא בִּשְׁלוּחוֹ מְקַדֵּשׁ, בּוֹ מִיבַּעְיָא?! אָמַר רַב יוֹסֵף: מִצְוָה בּוֹ יוֹתֵר מִבִּשְׁלוּחוֹ. כִּי הָא דְּרַב סָפְרָא מְחָרֵיךְ רֵישָׁא, רָבָא מָלַח שִׁיבּוּטָא.

**William Davidson Edition - English:**
**GEMARA:** The Gemara starts by questioning the need for the seemingly extraneous *halakha* stated in the mishna: **Now** that the mishna stated that **one can betroth** a woman **by** means of **his agent, is** it **necessary** to state that a man can betroth a woman **by himself? Rav Yosef says:** The mishna writes both *halakhot* to teach that although the betrothal is valid either way, it is **more** fitting that the **mitzva** be performed **by** the man **himself than by** means of **his agent.** This is **like that** story **of Rav Safra,** who **would** himself **singe the head** of an animal on Shabbat eve to prepare it to be eaten on Shabbat, and **Rava,** who **would salt a turbot fish** himself, to fulfill the mitzva to prepare for Shabbat, although this could have been done by others.


###### Kiddushin 41a:5
[Kiddushin 41a:5](https://torahapp.org/share/book/Kiddushin/r/41a:5)

אִיכָּא דְּאָמְרִי: בְּהָא אִיסּוּרָא נָמֵי אִית בֵּהּ, כִּדְרַב יְהוּדָה אָמַר רַב. דְּאָמַר רַב יְהוּדָה אָמַר רַב: אָסוּר לָאָדָם שֶׁיְּקַדֵּשׁ אֶת הָאִשָּׁה עַד שֶׁיִּרְאֶנָּה, שֶׁמָּא יִרְאֶה בָּהּ דָּבָר מְגוּנֶּה וְתִתְגַּנֶּה עָלָיו, וְרַחֲמָנָא אָמַר: ״וְאָהַבְתָּ לְרֵעֲךָ כָּמוֹךָ״.

**William Davidson Edition - English:**
**There are** those **who say: With regard to this** particular mitzva of betrothal, **it also involves a prohibition, in accordance with that** which **Rav Yehuda says** that **Rav says, as Rav Yehuda says** that **Rav says: It is forbidden for a man to betroth a woman until he sees her, lest he see something repulsive in her** after the betrothal, **and she will become repugnant to him,** which will cause him to hate her. **And** to prevent this violation of what **the Merciful One states** in the Torah: **“And you shall love your neighbor as yourself”** (Leviticus 19:18), the Sages ruled that a man must betroth a woman in person, to ensure that he approves of her.


###### Kiddushin 41a:6
[Kiddushin 41a:6](https://torahapp.org/share/book/Kiddushin/r/41a:6)

וְכִי אִיתְּמַר דְּרַב יוֹסֵף – אַסֵּיפָא אִיתְּמַר, הָאִשָּׁה מִתְקַדֶּשֶׁת בָּהּ וּבִשְׁלוּחָהּ. הַשְׁתָּא בִּשְׁלוּחָהּ מִיקַּדְּשָׁא בָּהּ מִיבַּעְיָא?! אָמַר רַב יוֹסֵף: מִצְוָה בָּהּ יוֹתֵר מִבִּשְׁלוּחָהּ. כִּי הָא דְּרַב סָפְרָא מְחָרֵיךְ רֵישָׁא, רָבָא מָלַח שִׁיבּוּטָא.

**William Davidson Edition - English:**
**And** if there is a prohibition against a man betrothing a women by means of an agent, then **when** the statement of **Rav Yosef was stated,** that it is merely preferable that the betrothal be performed without an agent, **it was stated with regard to the latter clause** of the mishna: **A woman can become betrothed by herself or by** means of **her agent. Now** that the mishna stated that **she can become betrothed by** means of **her agent, is** it **necessary** to state that she can become betrothed **by herself?** It was in response to this that **Rav Yosef says:** It is **more** fitting that the **mitzva** be performed **by** the woman **herself than by** means of **her agent.** This is **like that** story **of Rav Safra,** who **would** himself **singe the head** of an animal on Shabbat eve to prepare it to be eaten on Shabbat, and **Rava,** who **would** himself **salt a turbot fish.**


###### Kiddushin 41a:7
[Kiddushin 41a:7](https://torahapp.org/share/book/Kiddushin/r/41a:7)

אֲבָל בְּהָא אִיסּוּרָא לֵית בַּהּ, כִּדְרֵישׁ לָקִישׁ, דְּאָמַר רֵישׁ לָקִישׁ: טָב לְמֵיתַב טַן דּוּ מִלְּמֵיתַב אַרְמְלוּ.

**William Davidson Edition - English:**
**But in this** case of a woman who appoints an agent, **there is no prohibition, as that** which **Reish Lakish** said. **As Reish Lakish said:** Women have a saying: **It is better to sit** as **two bodies,** i.e., be married, **than to sit** lonely like **a widow.** Once a woman has decided to marry, she will accept any husband whose betrothal her agent accepts on her behalf, and there is no concern that she will find her betrothed repulsive and violate the mitzva of loving one’s neighbor like oneself.


###### Kiddushin 41a:8
[Kiddushin 41a:8](https://torahapp.org/share/book/Kiddushin/r/41a:8)

הָאִישׁ מְקַדֵּשׁ אֶת בִּתּוֹ כְּשֶׁהִיא נַעֲרָה. כְּשֶׁהִיא נַעֲרָה – אִין, כְּשֶׁהִיא קְטַנָּה – לָא. מְסַיַּיע לֵיהּ לְרַב, דְּאָמַר רַב יְהוּדָה אָמַר רַב וְאִיתֵּימָא רַבִּי אֶלְעָזָר: אָסוּר לְאָדָם שֶׁיְּקַדֵּשׁ אֶת בִּתּוֹ כְּשֶׁהִיא קְטַנָּה, עַד שֶׁתִּגְדַּל וְתֹאמַר: ״בִּפְלוֹנִי אֲנִי רוֹצָה״.

**William Davidson Edition - English:**
The mishna teaches: **A man can betroth his daughter** to a man **when she is a young woman.** The Gemara infers: **When she is a young woman, yes,** he can betroth her; **when she is a minor, no,** he cannot betroth her. This statement **supports** the opinion of **Rav, as Rav Yehuda says** that **Rav says, and some say** it was said by **Rabbi Elazar: It is prohibited for a person to betroth his daughter** to a man **when she is a minor, until** such time **that she grows up and says: I want** to marry **so-and-so.** If a father betroths his daughter when she is a minor and incapable of forming an opinion of the husband, she may later find herself married to someone she does not like.


###### Kiddushin 41a:9
[Kiddushin 41a:9](https://torahapp.org/share/book/Kiddushin/r/41a:9)

שְׁלִיחוּת מְנָלַן? דְּתַנְיָא: ״וְשִׁלַּח״ – מְלַמֵּד שֶׁהוּא עוֹשֶׂה שָׁלִיחַ.

**William Davidson Edition - English:**
§ The mishna states that an agent has the power to effect betrothal. The Gemara asks: **From where do we** derive that there is halakhic **agency?** The Gemara answers: **As it is taught** in a *baraita*: The Torah states with regard to one who divorces his wife: “That he writes her a bill of divorce, and gives it in her hand, and sends her [*veshilleḥah*] out of his house” (Deuteronomy 24:1). The verse employs the verb: **And he sends [*veshillaḥ*].** The fact that the verse employs the term *veshillaḥ*, as opposed to another verb denoting divorce, *vegereshah*, **teaches that he can appoint an agent [*shaliaḥ*],** as both words share the root *shin*, *lamed*, *ḥet*. The husband does not have to personally give his wife the bill of divorce.


###### Kiddushin 41a:10
[Kiddushin 41a:10](https://torahapp.org/share/book/Kiddushin/r/41a:10)

״וְשִׁלְּחָהּ״ – מְלַמֵּד שֶׁהִיא עוֹשָׂה ״שָׁלִיחַ״. ״וְשִׁלַּח״ ״וְשִׁלְּחָהּ״ – מְלַמֵּד שֶׁהַשָּׁלִיחַ עוֹשֶׂה שָׁלִיחַ.

**William Davidson Edition - English:**
Additionally, the fact that the term **“and he sends her [*veshilleḥah*]”** can also be read as: And she sends [*veshalleḥa*], **teaches that she** too **can appoint an agent** to accept her bill of divorce. Furthermore, in this same passage the verb is repeated in the phrases **“and he sends,” “and he sends her”** (Deuteronomy 24:1–3), which serves to **teach that an agent can appoint another agent.**


###### Kiddushin 41a:11
[Kiddushin 41a:11](https://torahapp.org/share/book/Kiddushin/r/41a:11)

אַשְׁכְּחַן בְּגֵירוּשִׁין, בְּקִידּוּשִׁין מְנָלַן? וְכִי תֵּימָא דְּיָלֵיף מִגֵּירוּשִׁין – מָה לְגֵירוּשִׁין, שֶׁכֵּן יֶשְׁנָן בְּעַל כׇּרְחָהּ! אָמַר קְרָא: ״וְיָצְאָה״ ״וְהָיְתָה״ – מַקִּישׁ הֲוָיָה לִיצִיאָה, מָה יְצִיאָה מְשַׁוֵּי שָׁלִיחַ – אַף הֲוָיָה נָמֵי מְשַׁוֵּי שָׁלִיחַ.

**William Davidson Edition - English:**
The Gemara asks: **We found** a source for agency **with regard to divorce; from where do we** derive that there is agency **with regard to betrothal? And if you would say that** it **is derived from divorce,** i.e., just as a wife can be divorced from her husband by means of an agent, she can become betrothed to him in the same way, the two cases are not similar: **What** is unique **about divorce is that it** can be effected **against her will,** while betrothal cannot. Therefore, a means of effecting divorce cannot necessarily be used to effect betrothal. The Gemara answers: **The verse states: “And she departs** out of his house, and goes **and becomes** another man’s wife” (Deuteronomy 24:2). Because the verse **juxtaposes becoming** married **to leaving** a marriage, **just as** a husband can **appoint an agent** for the purpose of **leaving** a marriage, **so too he** can **appoint an agent** for the purpose of **becoming** married.


###### Kiddushin 41a:12
[Kiddushin 41a:12](https://torahapp.org/share/book/Kiddushin/r/41a:12)

וְאֶלָּא הָא דִּתְנַן: הָאוֹמֵר לִשְׁלוּחוֹ: ״צֵא תְּרוֹם״ – תּוֹרֵם כְּדַעַת בַּעַל הַבַּיִת. וְאִם אֵינוֹ יוֹדֵעַ דַּעַת בַּעַל הַבַּיִת – תּוֹרֵם בְּבֵינוֹנִית, אֶחָד מֵחֲמִשִּׁים.

**William Davidson Edition - English:**
The Gemara objects: **But** there is **that which we learned** in a mishna (*Terumot* 4:4): In the case of **one who says to his agent: Go out** and **separate *teruma*** from my field’s produce for me, the agent **must separate** *teruma* **in accordance with the mindset of the owner.** He must separate the amount that he assumes the owner would want to give, as there is no fixed measure for the amount that one must set aside as *teruma*. A generous person would give as much as one-fortieth of the produce as *teruma*, while a stingy person would give one-sixtieth. **And if he does not know the mindset of the owner, he separates an intermediate** measure, which is **one-fiftieth** of the produce.