## Kiddushin Daf 81b

###### Kiddushin 81b:1
[Kiddushin 81b:1](https://torahapp.org/share/book/Kiddushin/r/81b:1)

תִּיב שַׁפִּיר. אֲמַר לֵיהּ: הַבוּ לִי כָּסָא, יְהַבוּ לֵיהּ כָּסָא. אַכְמַר שְׁדָא בֵּיהּ כִּיחוֹ. נְחַרוּ בֵּיהּ. שְׁקָא וּמִית. שְׁמַעוּ דַּהֲווֹ קָאָמְרִי: פְּלֵימוֹ קְטַל גַּבְרָא! פְּלֵימוֹ קְטַל גַּבְרָא! עֲרַק וּטְשָׁא נַפְשֵׁיהּ בְּבֵית הַכִּסֵּא. אָזֵיל בָּתְרֵיהּ, נְפַל קַמֵּיהּ. כִּי דְּחַזְיֵיהּ דַּהֲוָה מִצְטַעַר גַּלִּי לֵיהּ נַפְשֵׁיהּ. אֲמַר לֵיהּ: מַאי טַעְמָא אָמְרַתְּ הָכִי? וְאֶלָּא הֵיכִי אֵימָא? אֲמַר לֵיהּ: לֵימָא מָר ״רַחֲמָנָא נִגְעַר בֵּיהּ בְּשָׂטָן״.

**William Davidson Edition - English:**
**Sit properly** and do not act in a revolting manner. Satan then **said to him: Give me a cup. They gave him a cup. He coughed up his phlegm and spat it into** the cup. **They berated him** for acting this way, at which point Satan pretended to **sink** down **and die. They heard** people around them **saying: Peleimu killed a man! Peleimu killed a man!** Peleimu **fled and hid himself in the bathroom.** Satan **followed him** and **fell before him. Upon seeing that** Peleimu **was suffering, he revealed himself to him.** Satan **said to him: What is the reason that you spoke this way,** provoking me by saying: An arrow in the eye of Satan? He replied: **But what then should I say?** Satan **said to him: Let the Master,** i.e., Peleimu, **say:** Let **the Merciful One rebuke the Satan.**


###### Kiddushin 81b:2
[Kiddushin 81b:2](https://torahapp.org/share/book/Kiddushin/r/81b:2)

רַבִּי חִיָּיא בַּר אָשֵׁי הֲוָה רְגִיל כׇּל עִידָּן דַּהֲוָה נָפֵל לְאַפֵּיהּ הֲוָה אָמַר: ״הָרַחֲמָן יַצִּילֵנוּ מִיֵּצֶר הָרָע״. יוֹמָא חַד (שְׁמַעְתִּינְהוּ) [שְׁמַעְתֵּיהּ] דְּבֵיתְהוּ, אֲמַרָה: מִכְּדֵי הָא כַּמָּה שְׁנֵי דְּפָרֵישׁ לֵיהּ מִינַּאי, מַאי טַעְמָא קָאָמַר הָכִי?

**William Davidson Edition - English:**
The Gemara relates: **Rabbi Ḥiyya bar Ashi was accustomed to say, whenever he would fall on his face** in prayer: **May the Merciful One save us from the evil inclination. One day his wife heard him** saying this prayer. **She said: After all, it has been several years since he has withdrawn from** engaging in intercourse with **me** due to his advanced years. **What is the reason that he says this** prayer, as there is no concern that he will engage in sinful sexual behavior?


###### Kiddushin 81b:3
[Kiddushin 81b:3](https://torahapp.org/share/book/Kiddushin/r/81b:3)

יוֹמָא חֲדָא הֲוָה קָא גָרֵיס בְּגִינְּתֵיהּ. קַשִּׁטָה נַפְשַׁהּ, חָלְפָה וְתָנְיָיה קַמֵּיהּ. אֲמַר לַהּ: מַאן אַתְּ? אֲמַרָה: אֲנָא חָרוּתָא דַּהֲדַרִי מִיּוֹמָא. תַּבְעַהּ. אֲמַרָה לֵיהּ: אַיְיתִי נִיהֲלַי לְהָךְ רוּמָּנָא דְּרֵישׁ צוּצִיתָא. שְׁוַור, אֲזַל אַתְיֵיהּ נִיהֲלַהּ.

**William Davidson Edition - English:**
**One day,** while **he was studying in his garden, she adorned herself and repeatedly walked past him. He said: Who are you? She said: I am Ḥaruta,** a well-known prostitute, **returning from my day** at work. **He propositioned her. She said to him: Give me that pomegranate from the top of the tree** as payment. **He leapt up, went,** and **brought it to her,** and they engaged in intercourse.


###### Kiddushin 81b:4
[Kiddushin 81b:4](https://torahapp.org/share/book/Kiddushin/r/81b:4)

כִּי אֲתָא לְבֵיתֵיהּ הֲוָה קָא שָׁגְרָא דְּבֵיתְהוּ תַּנּוּרָא, סָלֵיק וְקָא יָתֵיב בְּגַוֵּיהּ. אֲמַרָה לֵיהּ: מַאי הַאי? אֲמַר לַהּ: הָכִי וְהָכִי הֲוָה מַעֲשֶׂה. אָמְרָה לֵיהּ: אֲנָא הֲוַאי. לָא אַשְׁגַּח בַּהּ, עַד דִּיהַבָה לֵיהּ סִימָנֵי. אָמַר לַהּ: אֲנָא מִיהָא לְאִיסּוּרָא אִיכַּוַּונִי. כׇּל יָמָיו שֶׁל אוֹתוֹ צַדִּיק הָיָה מִתְעַנֶּה עַד שֶׁמֵּת בְּאוֹתָהּ מִיתָה.

**William Davidson Edition - English:**
**When he came home, his wife was lighting** a fire in the **oven. He went and sat inside it. She said to him: What is this? He said to her: Such and such an incident** occurred; he told her that he engaged in intercourse with a prostitute. **She said to him: It was I. He paid no attention to her,** thinking she was merely trying to comfort him, **until she gave him signs** that it was indeed she. **He said to her: I, in any event, intended to transgress.** The Gemara relates: **All the days of that righteous man he would fast** for the transgression he intended to commit, **until he died by that death** in his misery.


###### Kiddushin 81b:5
[Kiddushin 81b:5](https://torahapp.org/share/book/Kiddushin/r/81b:5)

דְּתַנְיָא: ״אִישָׁהּ הֲפֵרָם וַה׳ יִסְלַח לָהּ״, בַּמָּה הַכָּתוּב מְדַבֵּר? בְּאִשָּׁה שֶׁנָּדְרָה בְּנָזִיר, וְשָׁמַע בַּעְלָהּ וְהֵפֵר לָהּ, וְהִיא לֹא יָדְעָה שֶׁהֵפֵר לָהּ בַּעְלָהּ, וְהָיְתָה שׁוֹתָה יַיִן וּמִטַּמְּאָה לְמֵתִים.

**William Davidson Edition - English:**
The Gemara explains the source that one who intended to transgress is punished even though he did not actually sin. **As it is taught** in a *baraita* concerning a husband who nullified the vow of his wife: **“Her husband has made them null; and the Lord will forgive her”** (Numbers 30:13). **With regard to what** case **is the verse speaking?** Why would the woman require forgiveness if her husband has nullified her vow? It is referring **to a woman who vowed** to **be a nazirite, and her husband heard and nullified her** vow. **And she did not know that her husband had nullified her** vow, **and she drank wine and contracted impurity from a corpse,** violating her presumed vow.


###### Kiddushin 81b:6
[Kiddushin 81b:6](https://torahapp.org/share/book/Kiddushin/r/81b:6)

רַבִּי עֲקִיבָא כִּי הֲוָה מָטֵי לְהַאי פְּסוּקָא הֲוָה בָּכֵי, אָמַר: וּמָה מִי שֶׁנִּתְכַּוֵּין לֶאֱכוֹל בְּשַׂר חֲזִיר וְעָלָה בְּיָדוֹ בְּשַׂר טָלֶה, אָמְרָה תּוֹרָה: צְרִיכָה כַּפָּרָה וּסְלִיחָה, מִי שֶׁנִּתְכַּוֵּין לֶאֱכוֹל בְּשַׂר חֲזִיר וְעָלָה בְּיָדוֹ בְּשַׂר חֲזִיר – עַל אַחַת כַּמָּה וְכַמָּה.

**William Davidson Edition - English:**
The Gemara relates: **When Rabbi Akiva came to this verse he would cry. He said: And if** with regard to **one who intended to eat pork, and** kosher **lamb came up in his hand,** like this woman who intended to violate her vow but in fact did not, **the Torah** nevertheless **says: She requires atonement and forgiveness, all the more so** does **one who intended to eat pork and pork came up in his hand** require atonement and forgiveness.


###### Kiddushin 81b:7
[Kiddushin 81b:7](https://torahapp.org/share/book/Kiddushin/r/81b:7)

כַּיּוֹצֵא בַּדָּבָר אַתָּה אוֹמֵר ״וְלֹא יָדַע וְאָשֵׁם וְנָשָׂא עֲוֹנוֹ״. כְּשֶׁהָיָה רַבִּי עֲקִיבָא מַגִּיעַ לְפָסוּק זֶה הָיָה בּוֹכֶה: וּמָה מִי שֶׁנִּתְכַּוֵּין לֶאֱכוֹל שׁוּמָּן וְעָלָה בְּיָדוֹ חֵלֶב – אָמְרָה תּוֹרָה: ״וְלֹא יָדַע וְאָשֵׁם וְנָשָׂא עֲוֹנוֹ״, מִי שֶׁנִּתְכַּוֵּין לֶאֱכוֹל חֵלֶב וְעָלָה בְּיָדוֹ חֵלֶב – עַל אַחַת כַּמָּה וְכַמָּה. אִיסִי בֶּן יְהוּדָה אוֹמֵר: ״וְלֹא יָדַע וְאָשֵׁם וְנָשָׂא עֲוֹנוֹ״ – עַל דָּבָר זֶה יִדְווּ כׇּל הַדּוֹוִים.

**William Davidson Edition - English:**
**In a similar manner, you** can **say** that the same lesson can be derived from the verse: **“Though he know it not, yet is he guilty, and shall bear his iniquity”** (Leviticus 5:17). **When Rabbi Akiva came to this verse he would cry.** He said: **And if** with regard to **one who intended to eat** permitted **fat, and** forbidden **fat** mistakenly **came up in his hand, the Torah states: “Though he know it not, yet is he guilty, and shall bear his iniquity,” all the more so** is this true for **one who intended to eat** forbidden **fat and** forbidden **fat came up in his hand. Isi ben Yehuda says** with regard to the verse **“Though he know it not, yet is he guilty, and shall bear his iniquity”: With regard to this matter all sufferers shall grieve,** since the verse teaches that one is punished even for sinning unawares.


###### Kiddushin 81b:8
[Kiddushin 81b:8](https://torahapp.org/share/book/Kiddushin/r/81b:8)

מִתְיַיחֵד אָדָם עִם אִמּוֹ. אָמַר רַב יְהוּדָה אָמַר רַב אַסִּי: מִתְיַיחֵד אָדָם עִם אֲחוֹתוֹ, וְדָר עִם אִמּוֹ וְעִם בִּתּוֹ. כִּי אַמְרִ[יתַ]הּ קַמֵּיהּ דִּשְׁמוּאֵל, אָמַר: אָסוּר לְהִתְיַיחֵד עִם כׇּל עֲרָיוֹת שֶׁבַּתּוֹרָה, וַאֲפִילּוּ עִם בְּהֵמָה.

**William Davidson Edition - English:**
§ The mishna teaches that **a man may be secluded with his mother. Rav Yehuda says** that **Rav Asi says: A man may be secluded with his sister, and live with his mother or with his daughter** in a permanent arrangement, without concern. **When he said this before Shmuel,** the latter **said: It is prohibited to be secluded with all those with whom relations are forbidden by the Torah, and even with an animal,** as it is prohibited to engage in intercourse with an animal as well.


###### Kiddushin 81b:9
[Kiddushin 81b:9](https://torahapp.org/share/book/Kiddushin/r/81b:9)

תְּנַן: מִתְיַיחֵד אָדָם עִם אִמּוֹ וְעִם בִּתּוֹ וְיָשֵׁן עִמָּהֶם בְּקֵירוּב בָּשָׂר, וּתְיוּבְתָּא דִשְׁמוּאֵל! אָמַר לָךְ שְׁמוּאֵל: וְלִיטַעְמָיךְ, הָא דְּתַנְיָא: אֲחוֹתוֹ וַחֲמוֹתוֹ וּשְׁאָר כׇּל עֲרָיוֹת שֶׁבַּתּוֹרָה אֵין מִתְיַיחֵד עִמָּהֶם אֶלָּא בְּעֵדִים. בְּעֵדִים – אִין, שֶׁלֹּא בְּעֵדִים – לָא!

**William Davidson Edition - English:**
**We learned** in the mishna: **A man may be secluded with his mother, and with his daughter, and sleep alongside them with bodily contact, and** this appears to be **a conclusive refutation of** the statement of **Shmuel.** The Gemara answers: **Shmuel** could have **said to you: And according to your reasoning,** how should one explain **that which is taught** in a *baraita*: With regard to **his sister, and his mother-in-law, and all those with whom relations are forbidden,** including his mother and daughter, **one may be secluded with them only** in the presence **of witnesses,** from which it can be inferred: In the presence **of witnesses, yes; without** the presence **of witnesses, no.** This *baraita* supports the opinion of Shmuel that one may not be secluded with his mother or sister.


###### Kiddushin 81b:10
[Kiddushin 81b:10](https://torahapp.org/share/book/Kiddushin/r/81b:10)

אֶלָּא תַּנָּאֵי הִיא. דְּתַנְיָא, אָמַר רַבִּי מֵאִיר: הִזָּהֲרוּ בִּי מִפְּנֵי בִּתִּי. אָמַר רַבִּי טַרְפוֹן: הִזָּהֲרוּ בִּי מִפְּנֵי כַּלָּתִי. לִיגְלֵג עָלָיו אוֹתוֹ תַּלְמִיד. אָמַר רַבִּי אֲבָהוּ מִשּׁוּם רַבִּי חֲנִינָא בֶּן גַּמְלִיאֵל: לֹא הָיוּ יָמִים מוּעָטִים עַד שֶׁנִּכְשַׁל אוֹתוֹ תַּלְמִיד בַּחֲמוֹתוֹ.

**William Davidson Edition - English:**
**Rather,** it **is** a dispute between ***tanna’im*** as to whether one may be secluded with his mother or sister. **As it is taught** in a *baraita*: **Rabbi Meir said: Be careful with me because of my daughter,** i.e., make sure I am not left secluded with her. Similarly, **Rabbi Tarfon said: Be careful with me because of my daughter-in-law. A certain student mocked him** for being wary of the possibility of sinning with his daughter-in-law. **Rabbi Abbahu said in the name of Rabbi Ḥanina ben Gamliel: Not many days passed until that student stumbled** into sin **with his mother-in-law.**


###### Kiddushin 81b:11
[Kiddushin 81b:11](https://torahapp.org/share/book/Kiddushin/r/81b:11)

אֲפִילּוּ עִם בְּהֵמָה אַבָּיֵי מְכַלֵּ[י] לֵיהּ מִכּוּלֵּהּ דַּבְרָא. רַב שֵׁשֶׁת מְעַבַּר לֵיהּ מִצְרָא. רַב חָנָן מִנְּהַרְדְּעָא אִיקְּלַע לְרַב כָּהֲנָא לְפוּם נַהֲרָא. חַזְיֵיהּ דְּיָתֵיב וְקָא גָרֵס וְקָיְימָא בְּהֵמָה קַמֵּיהּ. אֲמַר לֵיהּ: לָא סָבַר לַהּ מָר אֲפִילּוּ עִם בְּהֵמָה? אֲמַר לֵיהּ: לָאו אַדַּעְתַּאי.

**William Davidson Edition - English:**
The Gemara stated that according to Shmuel it is prohibited for one to be alone **even with an animal.** The Gemara relates: **Abaye removed** the animals **from the entire field** he was in. **Rav Sheshet transferred** the animals to the other side **of the fence. Rav Ḥanan from Neharde’a happened** to come **to Rav Kahana in Pum Nahara. He saw that** he **was sitting and studying, and an animal was standing before him.** Rav Ḥanan **said to him: Doesn’t the Master hold** that one may not be secluded **even with an animal?** Rav Kahana **said to him: It** did **not** enter **my mind** that an animal was before me.


###### Kiddushin 81b:12
[Kiddushin 81b:12](https://torahapp.org/share/book/Kiddushin/r/81b:12)

אָמַר רָבָא: מִתְיַיחֵד אָדָם עִם שְׁתֵּי יְבָמוֹת וְעִם שְׁתֵּי צָרוֹת, עִם אִשָּׁה וַחֲמוֹתָהּ, עִם אִשָּׁה וּבַת בַּעְלָהּ, עִם אִשָּׁה וְתִינוֹקֶת שֶׁיּוֹדַעַת טַעַם בִּיאָה, וְאֵין מוֹסֶרֶת עַצְמָהּ לְבִיאָה.

**William Davidson Edition - English:**
**Rava says: A man may be secluded with two sisters-in-law and with two rival wives,** i.e., two women who share a husband; **with a woman and her mother-in-law;** and **with a woman and her husband’s daughter.** Since these women typically dislike each other, each fears that the other will publicize her sins, and they will be careful not to transgress. Similarly, a man may be secluded **with a woman and a girl who knows the meaning of sexual intercourse,** i.e., one who is old enough to understand the nature of intercourse, **but** is still young enough that **she does not submit herself to intercourse,** since she does not yet desire it. In such a situation, the woman is concerned that the child will reveal her behavior.


###### Kiddushin 81b:13
[Kiddushin 81b:13](https://torahapp.org/share/book/Kiddushin/r/81b:13)

הִגְדִּילוּ זֶה יָשֵׁן בִּכְסוּתוֹ וְכוּ׳. וְכַמָּה? אָמַר רַב אַדָּא בַּר רַב (עֻזָּא) [עַוָּא] אָמַר רַב אַסִּי: תִּינוֹקֶת בַּת תֵּשַׁע שָׁנִים וְיוֹם אֶחָד, תִּינוֹק בֶּן שְׁתֵּים עֶשְׂרֵה שָׁנָה וְיוֹם אֶחָד. אִיכָּא דְאָמְרִי: תִּינוֹקֶת בַּת שְׁתֵּים עֶשְׂרֵה שָׁנָה וְיוֹם אֶחָד, תִּינוֹק בֶּן שְׁלֹשׁ עֶשְׂרֵה וְיוֹם אֶחָד, וְזֶה וְזֶה כְּדֵי שֶׁיִּהְיוּ ״שָׁדַיִם נָכֹנוּ וּשְׂעָרֵךְ צִמֵּחַ״.

**William Davidson Edition - English:**
§ The mishna teaches that **when** one’s children **have grown up, this one sleeps in his garment** and that one sleeps in her garment, but they may share a bed. The Gemara asks: **And how** old must a child be to be considered grown up for the purposes of this *halakha*? **Rav Adda bar Rav Azza says** that **Rav Asi says: A girl** must reach the **age** of **nine years and one day; a boy** must reach the **age** of **twelve years and one day. There are** those **who say: A girl** must reach the **age** of **twelve years and one day; a boy** must reach the **age** of **thirteen** years **and one day. And** according to **this and that,** according to both opinions, the girl is considered a child **until** she has reached the stage of: **“Your breasts were fashioned, and your hair was grown”** (Ezekiel 16:7), meaning the onset of puberty.


###### Kiddushin 81b:14
[Kiddushin 81b:14](https://torahapp.org/share/book/Kiddushin/r/81b:14)

אָמַר רַפְרָם בַּר פָּפָּא אָמַר רַב חִסְדָּא: לֹא שָׁנוּ אֶלָּא שֶׁאֵינָהּ בּוֹשָׁה לַעֲמוֹד לְפָנָיו עֲרוּמָּה, אֲבָל בּוֹשָׁה לַעֲמוֹד לְפָנָיו עֲרוּמָּה – אָסוּר. מַאי טַעְמָא – יֵצֶר אַלְבְּשַׁהּ.

**William Davidson Edition - English:**
**Rafram bar Pappa says** that **Rav Ḥisda says: They taught** that a man may sleep in close proximity to his minor daughter **only if she is not ashamed to stand naked before him, but** if she is **ashamed to stand naked before him, it is prohibited** for him to sleep close to her, regardless of her age. **What is the reason?** It is that the **inclination has a hold upon her,** as otherwise she would not be ashamed.


###### Kiddushin 81b:15
[Kiddushin 81b:15](https://torahapp.org/share/book/Kiddushin/r/81b:15)

רַב אַחָא בַּר אַבָּא אִיקְּלַע לְבֵי רַב חִסְדָּא חַתְנֵיהּ. שַׁקְלֵיהּ לְבַת בְּרַתֵּיה אוֹתְבַהּ בְּכַנְפֵיהּ. אֲמַר לֵיהּ: לָא סָבַר לַהּ מָר דְּמִקַּדְּשָׁא? אֲמַר לֵיהּ: עֲבַרְתְּ לָךְ אַדְּרַב. דְּאָמַר רַב יְהוּדָה אָמַר רַב, וְאִיתֵּימָא רַבִּי אֶלְעָזָר: אָסוּר לְאָדָם שֶׁיְּקַדֵּשׁ אֶת בִּתּוֹ כְּשֶׁהִיא קְטַנָּה, עַד שֶׁתַּגְדִּיל וְתֹאמַר: ״בִּפְלוֹנִי אֲנִי רוֹצָה״. מָר נָמֵי עֲבַר לֵיהּ אַדִּשְׁמוּאֵל, דְּאָמַר שְׁמוּאֵל: אֵין מִשְׁתַּמְּשִׁים בְּאִשָּׁה! אֲמַר לֵיהּ: אֲנָא כְּאִידַּךְ דִּשְׁמוּאֵל סְבִירָא לִי, דְּאָמַר שְׁמוּאֵל:

**William Davidson Edition - English:**
The Gemara relates: **Rav Aḥa bar Abba arrived at the house of Rav Ḥisda, his son-in-law. He took his daughter’s daughter and placed her on his lap.** Rav Ḥisda **said to him: Doesn’t the Master think that she** might already be **betrothed?** Rav Aḥa **said to him:** If that is true, **you have transgressed** the ruling **of Rav, as Rav Yehuda says** that **Rav says, and some say** it was said by **Rabbi Elazar: It is prohibited for a man to betroth his daughter when she is a minor, until she grows up and says: I want** to marry **so-and-so,** as otherwise she might reject the designated husband and ultimately sin by committing adultery. Rav Ḥisda replied: **The Master has likewise transgressed** the words **of Shmuel. As Shmuel says: One may not make use of a woman,** so how can you hold her on your lap? **He said to him: I hold in accordance with another** statement **of Shmuel, as Shmuel says:**