## Shivchei HaRan, An Account of His Pilgrimage to the Holy Land

###### Shivchei HaRan, An Account of His Pilgrimage to the Holy Land 33:1
[Shivchei HaRan, An Account of His Pilgrimage to the Holy Land 33:1](https://torahapp.org/share/book/Shivchei%20HaRan/s/An%20Account%20of%20His%20Pilgrimage%20to%20the%20Holy%20Land/r/33:1)

וְאַחַר כָּל אֵלֶּה, אַחַר אֲשֶׁר עָשָׂה כָּל מִינֵי עֲבוֹדוֹת הַנַּ"ל בֶּאֱמֶת וּבְתָמִים, וְהִרְבָּה בְּתַעֲנִיתִים וּבִתְפִלּוֹת רַבּוֹת מְאֹד וּבְסִגּוּפִים וּשְׁבִירַת תַּאֲווֹת וּמִדּוֹת, וְעָמַד בְּנִסְיוֹנוֹת רַבּוֹת וּשְׁאָר כָּל עִנְיָנִים הַנַּ"ל, וְהִרְבָּה בְּהִתְבּוֹדְדוּת מְאֹד מְאֹד לְדַבֵּר בֵּינוֹ לְבֵין קוֹנוֹ וּלְפָרֵשׁ שִׂיחָתוֹ בִּלְשׁוֹן אַשְׁכְּנַז וְכוּ' כַּנַּ"ל.

**Rabbi Nachman's Wisdom, trans. Aryeh Kaplan, Jerusalem. Breslov Research Institute, 1973:**
No matter how high he stood, the Rebbe was never satisfied with his accomplishments. He had practiced honestly and earnestly every type of devotion mentioned above, fasting and praying and forcing himself to do things to overcome his desires and emotions. He had already withstood countless temptations and spent days and years secluding himself with God to express his thoughts in his own words.


###### Shivchei HaRan, An Account of His Pilgrimage to the Holy Land 33:2
[Shivchei HaRan, An Account of His Pilgrimage to the Holy Land 33:2](https://torahapp.org/share/book/Shivchei%20HaRan/s/An%20Account%20of%20His%20Pilgrimage%20to%20the%20Holy%20Land/r/33:2)

עַד שֶׁזָּכָה לְמַדְרֵגָה גְּבֹהָה וְעֶלְיוֹנָה מְאֹד מְאֹד בְּתַכְלִית הַקְּדֻשָּׁה וּבְתַכְלִית הַבִּטּוּל וּבְהִתְקָרְבוּת גָּדוֹל לה' יִתְבָּרַךְ בְּמַדְרֵגַת גְּדוֹלֵי בְּנֵי עֲלִיָּה. וְכָל זֶה זָכָה בִּימֵי יַלְדוּתוֹ מַמָּשׁ, כִּי יוֹמָם לֹא נָח לַיְלָה לֹא נָם וְלֹא שָׁקַט. וְהִתְמִיד מְאֹד בַּעֲבוֹדָתוֹ מִיּוֹם אֶל יוֹם מִתְּחִלַּת יְמֵי קַטְנוּתוֹ וִימֵי נְעוּרָיו. וְיָגַע וְטָרַח מְאֹד מִיּוֹם אֶל יוֹם, עַד שֶׁזָּכָה בִּימֵי נְעוּרָיו מַמָּשׁ לְכָל הַנַּ"ל לִקְדֻשָּׁה גְּבוֹהָה וְנוֹרָאָה וְהַשָּׂגָה עֲצוּמָה מְאֹד וְכוּ' בְּמַדְרֵגַת גְּדוֹלֵי בְּנֵי עֲלִיָּה.

**Rabbi Nachman's Wisdom, trans. Aryeh Kaplan, Jerusalem. Breslov Research Institute, 1973:**
Constantly striving in this manner, he merited to an extremely high and lofty level of the utmost sanctity and the utmost selflessness, with a degree of closeness to God on the level of the greatest denizens on high. The Rebbe attained all this while he was literally in his childhood. He neither rested by day nor slept or was silent by night. Never keeping still, he toiled and labored day in and day out, until literally in his youth he achieved lofty, awesome sanctity and profound perception on the level of the greatest denizens on high.


###### Shivchei HaRan, An Account of His Pilgrimage to the Holy Land 33:3
[Shivchei HaRan, An Account of His Pilgrimage to the Holy Land 33:3](https://torahapp.org/share/book/Shivchei%20HaRan/s/An%20Account%20of%20His%20Pilgrimage%20to%20the%20Holy%20Land/r/33:3)

וְאַחַר אֲשֶׁר זָכָה לְכָל זֶה, אַף־עַל־פִּי־כֵן לֹא הָיָה מְקָרֵר דַּעְתּוֹ בָּזֶה וְלֹא הִנִּיחַ עַצְמוֹ לַעֲמֹד. רַק גַּם אַחַר־כָּךְ, בְּכָל יוֹם וּבְכָל שָׁעָה הָיָה מִשְׁתּוֹקֵק וּמִתְגַּעְגֵּעַ וְנִכְסָף לה' יִתְבָּרַךְ כְּאִלּוּ לֹא הִתְחִיל עֲדַיִן כְּלָל בְּשׁוּם עֲבוֹדָה בָּעוֹלָם. וַאֲפִלּוּ אַחַר שֶׁבָּא מֵאֶרֶץ־יִשְׂרָאֵל וְזָכָה שָׁם לְהַשָּׂגָה עֶלְיוֹנָה וּגְבֹהָה מְאֹד מְאֹד אֲשֶׁר אֵין לְשַׁעֵר כְּלָל, אַף־עַל־פִּי־כֵן מִיּוֹם שֶׁבָּא מֵאֶרֶץ־יִשְׂרָאֵל עַד הַיּוֹם שֶׁנִּסְתַּלֵּק בְּשָׁלוֹם לְמַעְלָה לְמַעְלָה, הָיָה לוֹ תָּמִיד גַּעְגּוּעִים וְכִסּוּפִין וְכוּ' לה' יִתְבָּרַךְ כְּאִלּוּ לֹא הִתְחִיל עֲדַיִן כְּלָל.

**Rabbi Nachman's Wisdom, trans. Aryeh Kaplan, Jerusalem. Breslov Research Institute, 1973:**
But even after achieving all this, the Rebbe was not satisfied and did not allow himself to stagnate. Every hour and every day, he would desire, long and yearn for God as if he had not yet begun to serve Him at all. Even after the Rebbe returned from the Holy Land – where he attained a perception so high that it was beyond measure – until the day he departed from the world in peace, he always had this longing and yearning for God. He may have stood on the loftiest heights, but in his mind he had not yet begun the climb.


###### Shivchei HaRan, An Account of His Pilgrimage to the Holy Land 33:4
[Shivchei HaRan, An Account of His Pilgrimage to the Holy Land 33:4](https://torahapp.org/share/book/Shivchei%20HaRan/s/An%20Account%20of%20His%20Pilgrimage%20to%20the%20Holy%20Land/r/33:4)

וּלְסַפֵּר בְּעִנְיָן זֶה תִּקְצַר הֲמוֹן יְרִיעוֹת אֲפִלּוּ מַה שֶּׁזָּכִינוּ לְהָבִין קְצָת בְּעִנְיָן זֶה כְּפִי מַה שֶּׁשָּׁמַעְנוּ מִפִּיו הַקָּדוֹשׁ וְרָאִינוּ בְּעֵינֵינוּ. כִּי בְּכָל פַּעַם הָיָה דַּרְכּוֹ שֶׁהָיָה מִתְגַּעְגֵּעַ לה' יִתְבָּרַךְ, וְהָיָה שָׁפָל בְּעֵינֵי עַצְמוֹ בֶּאֱמֶת, וְהָיָה לוֹ רַחֲמָנוּת גָּדוֹל עַל־עַצְמוֹ כְּאִלּוּ לֹא הֵרִיחַ עֲדַיִן מֵעוֹלָם שׁוּם רֵיחַ שֶׁל עֲבוֹדַת הַשֵּׁם, וּכְמוֹ שֶׁלֹּא הִתְחִיל עֲדַיִן כְּלָל.

**Rabbi Nachman's Wisdom, trans. Aryeh Kaplan, Jerusalem. Breslov Research Institute, 1973:**
It would consume many volumes to tell even the small amount we were worthy of understanding from what we heard from his holy lips and saw with our own eyes. For this was the Rebbe’s way. He would constantly thirst for God, genuinely humbling and pitying himself as if he had never inhaled the perfume of true devotion and had not yet achieved even the level of a beginner.


###### Shivchei HaRan, An Account of His Pilgrimage to the Holy Land 33:5
[Shivchei HaRan, An Account of His Pilgrimage to the Holy Land 33:5](https://torahapp.org/share/book/Shivchei%20HaRan/s/An%20Account%20of%20His%20Pilgrimage%20to%20the%20Holy%20Land/r/33:5)

וּבֶאֱמֶת אֲפִלּוּ מִי שֶׁעָבַר עַל כָּל הַתּוֹרָה כֻּלָּהּ, ח"ו, כַּמָּה וְכַמָּה פְּעָמִים, וּכְשֶׁזֶּה הָאִישׁ נִתְעוֹרֵר בִּתְשׁוּבָה בֶּאֱמֶת, שֶׁאָז בְּוַדַּאי כְּשֶׁמִּסְתַּכֵּל בְּעַצְמוֹ הֵיכָן הוּא בָּעוֹלָם בְּוַדַּאי יֵשׁ לוֹ לֵב נִשְׁבָּר מְאֹד וְיֵשׁ לוֹ רַחֲמָנוּת גָּדוֹל מְאֹד עַל־עַצְמוֹ בְּהַכְנָעָה גְּדוֹלָה וְכוּ', וְאֵין צָרִיךְ לְהַאֲרִיךְ בָּזֶה בְּדָבָר הַמּוּבָן מֵעַצְמוֹ, אַף־עַל־פִּי־כֵן, אֲפִלּוּ זֹאת הָרַחֲמָנוּת וְהַלֵּב נִשְׁבָּר שֶׁל הַבַּעַל תְּשׁוּבָה הַנַּ"ל לֹא יַגִּיעַ לְחֵלֶק מֵאֶלֶף וּרְבָבָה שֶׁל גֹּדֶל הָרַחֲמָנוּת וְהַלֵּב נִשְׁבָּר בְּהַכְנָעָה גְּדוֹלָה וְכוּ' שֶׁהָיָה לְרַבֵּנוּ ז"ל, בְּכָל פַּעַם וּפַעַם קֹדֶם שֶׁבָּא לְאֵיזֶה הַשָּׂגָה.

**Rabbi Nachman's Wisdom, trans. Aryeh Kaplan, Jerusalem. Breslov Research Institute, 1973:**
To understand this, you must imagine a person who had committed every possible sin time and time again. Imagine now that such a person was aroused to true repentance. Try to depict the way he would look at himself. He would certainly have great humility and self-pity, and be bitter and brokenhearted because of his past deeds. All his self-pity and brokenheartedness would not come to a thousandth, or even a millionth, of the great humility, self-pity and brokenheartedness that the Rebbe experienced each time before he attained a new degree of perception.


###### Shivchei HaRan, An Account of His Pilgrimage to the Holy Land 33:6
[Shivchei HaRan, An Account of His Pilgrimage to the Holy Land 33:6](https://torahapp.org/share/book/Shivchei%20HaRan/s/An%20Account%20of%20His%20Pilgrimage%20to%20the%20Holy%20Land/r/33:6)

וְהַכְּלָל, כִּי לְעוֹלָם לֹא נָח וְלֹא שָׁקַט אֲפִלּוּ בִּימֵי גְּדֻלָּתוֹ. אַף־עַל־פִּי שֶׁכְּבָר זָכָה לְמַה שֶּׁזָּכָה לְהַשָּׂגַת אֱלֹקוּת בְּמַדְרֵגָה גְּבֹהָה עֲצוּמָה וְנוֹרָאָה מְאֹד, אַף־עַל־פִּי־כֵן לֹא הָיָה מִסְתַּפֵּק עַצְמוֹ בָּזֶה, וְטָרַח וְיָגַע בְּכָל־עֵת וּבְכָל שָׁעָה, וְקִבֵּל יִסּוּרִין עַל־עַצְמוֹ יִסּוּרִים קָשִׁים וּמָרִים אֲשֶׁר כִּמְעַט אֵין דֻּגְמָתָם בָּעוֹלָם, וְהִרְבָּה בִּתְפִלּוֹת וְתַחֲנוּנִים וּבְהַפְצָרוֹת וּבַקָּשׁוֹת רַבּוֹת וּבְגַעְגּוּעִים וְכִסּוּפִין גְּדוֹלִים וְנוֹרָאִים מְאֹד מְאֹד, עַד שֶׁבָּא לְהַשָּׂגָה וּמַדְרֵגָה יוֹתֵר עֶלְיוֹנָה. וְאַחַר־כָּךְ, תֵּכֶף שֶׁזָּכָה לְזֹאת הַהַשָּׂגָה וְאָז הָיָה קְצָת בְּשִׂמְחָה.

**Rabbi Nachman's Wisdom, trans. Aryeh Kaplan, Jerusalem. Breslov Research Institute, 1973:**
The Rebbe was a man who never rested or stood still. Even as an adult, when he had already attained an awesome perception of the Godly, he was not satisfied and continued to aspire for more. He accepted upon himself unparalleled suffering and abounded with prayers and petitions urging God to help him. He continued with a powerful, intense yearning until he would finally attain an even higher level of perception.


###### Shivchei HaRan, An Account of His Pilgrimage to the Holy Land 33:7
[Shivchei HaRan, An Account of His Pilgrimage to the Holy Land 33:7](https://torahapp.org/share/book/Shivchei%20HaRan/s/An%20Account%20of%20His%20Pilgrimage%20to%20the%20Holy%20Land/r/33:7)

וְלִפְעָמִים זָכִינוּ לִשְׁמֹעַ מִפִּיו שֶׁהוֹדִיעַ לָנוּ שֶׁכָּעֵת נוֹדַע לוֹ חֲדָשׁוֹת וְכוּ' וְאָז הָיָה שָׂמֵחַ קְצָת. וְאַחַר־כָּךְ, תֵּכֶף שֶׁזָּכָה לָזֶה אַחַר־כָּךְ הִתְחִיל עוֹד מֵחָדָשׁ וְשָׁכַח כָּל הֶעָבָר כְּאִלּוּ לֹא הִתְחִיל עֲדַיִן כְּלָל, וְחָזַר וְהִתְחִיל מֵחָדָשׁ כְּמוֹ שֶׁמַּתְחִיל לֵילֵךְ וְלִכְנֹס בִּקְדֻשַּׁת יִשְׂרָאֵל.

**Rabbi Nachman's Wisdom, trans. Aryeh Kaplan, Jerusalem. Breslov Research Institute, 1973:**
When he achieved a new level, he would be happy for a brief time. Occasionally, we were worthy of hearing new insights from his mouth and he would experience some joy. But then he would immediately begin anew. All his previous efforts would be forgotten as if he had not yet even taken the first step. He would begin afresh, like one taking his first steps into the realm of holiness.


###### Shivchei HaRan, An Account of His Pilgrimage to the Holy Land 33:8
[Shivchei HaRan, An Account of His Pilgrimage to the Holy Land 33:8](https://torahapp.org/share/book/Shivchei%20HaRan/s/An%20Account%20of%20His%20Pilgrimage%20to%20the%20Holy%20Land/r/33:8)

וְלִפְעָמִים הָיִינוּ שׁוֹמְעִים מִפִּיו הַקָּדוֹשׁ בְּפֵרוּשׁ שֶׁאָמַר בִּלְשׁוֹן הִשְׁתּוֹקְקוּת וְכִסּוּפִין: אֵיךְ זוֹכִין לִהְיוֹת יְהוּדִי? וְאָמַר זֹאת בֶּאֱמֶת וּבִתְמִימוּת גָּדוֹל כְּאִלּוּ לֹא הִתְחִיל עֲדַיִן כְּלָל. וְכֵן הָיָה כַּמָּה פְּעָמִים.

**Rabbi Nachman's Wisdom, trans. Aryeh Kaplan, Jerusalem. Breslov Research Institute, 1973:**
Often we heard the Rebbe say with longing and yearning, “How is one worthy of being a Jew?” (see “*His Wisdom*” #159). He would mean these words sincerely, for he truly felt that he had not yet really taken the first step. This occurred numerous times.


###### Shivchei HaRan, An Account of His Pilgrimage to the Holy Land 33:9
[Shivchei HaRan, An Account of His Pilgrimage to the Holy Land 33:9](https://torahapp.org/share/book/Shivchei%20HaRan/s/An%20Account%20of%20His%20Pilgrimage%20to%20the%20Holy%20Land/r/33:9)

וְהָיָה תָּמִיד הוֹלֵךְ וְעוֹלֶה מִמַּדְרֵגָה לְמַדְרֵגָה. אַף־עַל־פִּי שֶׁזָּכָה לְמַדְרֵגוֹת גְּבוֹהוֹת וְנוֹרָאוֹת מְאֹד לְמַעְלָה לְמַעְלָה וְכוּ', אַף־עַל־פִּי־כֵן מֵעוֹלָם לֹא הָיָה מְקָרֵר דַּעְתּוֹ בָּזֶה כְּלָל, וְתֵכֶף אַחַר־כָּךְ הָיָה לוֹ לֵב נִשְׁבָּר וְהָיָה לוֹ רַחֲמָנוּת גָּדוֹל עַל־עַצְמוֹ בְּהַכְנָעָה גְּדוֹלָה וְכוּ' כַּנַּ"ל, עַד שֶׁזָּכָה לְמַדְרֵגָה יוֹתֵר גְּבוֹהָה. וְכֵן הָיָה דַּרְכּוֹ תָּמִיד עַד הַסּוֹף.

**Rabbi Nachman's Wisdom, trans. Aryeh Kaplan, Jerusalem. Breslov Research Institute, 1973:**
Although he reached awesomely high levels, he would constantly seek a higher level, soaring ever higher. Still, he was never satisfied with himself. As soon as he reached a new level, he would again begin anew with a broken heart and deep humility, until he was able to attain a still higher step. This was always the Rebbe’s way, even at the end.


###### Shivchei HaRan, An Account of His Pilgrimage to the Holy Land 33:10
[Shivchei HaRan, An Account of His Pilgrimage to the Holy Land 33:10](https://torahapp.org/share/book/Shivchei%20HaRan/s/An%20Account%20of%20His%20Pilgrimage%20to%20the%20Holy%20Land/r/33:10)

וְכַמָּה וְכַמָּה פְּעָמִים הָיָה דַּרְכּוֹ שֶׁאָמַר שֶׁעַתָּה אֵינוֹ יוֹדֵעַ כְּלָל כְּלָל, וּכְלָל לֹא. וּפְעָמִים נִשְׁבַּע עַל זֶה שֶׁבֶּאֱמֶת אֵינוֹ יוֹדֵעַ כְּלָל. אַף־עַל־פִּי שֶׁבַּיּוֹם הַקּוֹדֵם וּבַשָּׁעָה הַקּוֹדֶמֶת גִּלָּה דְּבָרִים עַתִּיקִים, אַף־עַל־פִּי־כֵן אַחַר־כָּךְ אָמַר שֶׁאֵינוֹ יוֹדֵעַ כְּלָל. וּבְעִנְיָן זֶה הָיָה חִדּוּשׁ גָּדוֹל מְאֹד מְאֹד.

**Rabbi Nachman's Wisdom, trans. Aryeh Kaplan, Jerusalem. Breslov Research Institute, 1973:**
Many times the Rebbe would say, “Now I know nothing, nothing, nothing at all.” There are times when he would swear, “In truth, I know absolutely nothing at all.”⁷⁷, the Shabbat after Tisha B’Av, 1 Av 5570 (August 11, 1810), in Uman, just about two months before his passing. See "*His Wisdom*" #153; *Yemey Moharnat* #51; *Tzaddik* #112. He would even say this shortly after he had revealed words of enduring truth (cf. *Pesachim* 119a; *Bava Batra* 91b). His wisdom shone forth and still he insisted that he was totally ignorant. In this respect, the Rebbe was most unique.

footnotes:
⁷⁷ This occurred on Shabbat Nachamu


###### Shivchei HaRan, An Account of His Pilgrimage to the Holy Land 33:11
[Shivchei HaRan, An Account of His Pilgrimage to the Holy Land 33:11](https://torahapp.org/share/book/Shivchei%20HaRan/s/An%20Account%20of%20His%20Pilgrimage%20to%20the%20Holy%20Land/r/33:11)

וְאָמַר בְּפֵרוּשׁ עַל־עַצְמוֹ: שֶׁהַתּוֹרָה שֶׁלּוֹ הוּא חִדּוּשׁ גָּדוֹל מְאֹד, אֲבָל "הָאֵינוֹ יוֹדֵעַ" שֶׁלּוֹ הוּא חִדּוּשׁ גָּדוֹל בְּיוֹתֵר. הַיְנוּ עִנְיָן הַנַּ"ל, כִּי בְּכָל פַּעַם הָיָה דַּרְכּוֹ לוֹמַר שֶׁעַכְשָׁו אֵינוֹ יוֹדֵעַ כְּלָל (וְעַיֵּן עוֹד מִזֶּה בְּמָקוֹם אַחֵר)

**Rabbi Nachman's Wisdom, trans. Aryeh Kaplan, Jerusalem. Breslov Research Institute, 1973:**
The Rebbe said, “My teachings are very unique, but my ignorance is even more unique.” That is, he was unique in realizing his ultimate ignorance before God.⁷⁸ #51; "*His Wisdom*" loc. cit. Also see "*His Pilgrimage to the Holy Land*" #35; "*His Wisdom*" #3.

footnotes:
⁷⁸ Yemey Moharnat