מַה־יָּקָר How precious is Your loving-kindness, O God, and the children of men find refuge under the shadow of Your wings. They are filled with the rich plenty of Your House. You give them drink from Your river of delights. For with You is the fountain of life; in Your light, we see light. Continue Your loving-kindness to those who know You, and Your righteousness to the upright in heart.

רִבּוֹן כָּל הָעוֹלָמִים Master of all worlds, compassionate, forgiving Father, You whose right hand is stretched out to bring in penitents, and who created man, intending to do good for him at his life’s end; You created him with two impulses, one urging him to good, the other goading him to evil, so that the choice between good and evil would remain in his hands, and to give him good reward when he chooses the good, for so Your wisdom decreed, as it is written: “See that I have given you today life and goodness; death and evil… Now, choose life.”

And now, my God, I have failed to listen to Your voice, and have allowed my evil impulse and the course of my own heart to guide me; I have scorned goodness and chosen evil; and not only have I failed to sanctify my limbs – I have defiled them.

You made within me a brain and heart, and with them the power of thought, with which I may develop good intentions and good reflections; and a heart to understand Your words of holiness, to pray and to recite every blessing with pure intentions – and I have made these impure with forbidden reveries and distractions. (Not only this, but through such forbidden musings I have come to emit semen wastefully, sometimes willfully, and sometimes against my will, with the impurity of proscribed emissions, which makes the whole body impure; and on these occasions I have created adversaries and destroyers, which are known as the afflictions of men). Alas – for with better intentions I could have created holy angels, which would be defenders and champions for me; and in place of these I have formed destroyers to damage my own self, as it is written: “I shall punish him with the rod of people, and with the afflictions of men.”

You made me eyes, and in them the sense of sight by which we may see what You have written in the Torah, and which I am to make holy by looking at what is holy. You warned us in Your Torah: “Do not stray after your heart or after your eyes.” Alas, I have strayed after my eyes and made them impure, by looking at impure things of all kinds.

You made me ears, to hear words of holiness and words of Torah; alas, I have made them impure by listening to disgraceful and slanderous words and forbidden speech. Alas to any ear that hears such words.

You made me a mouth and tongue and teeth and a palate and throat, and You gave these, the five articulators, the ability to speak the holy letters of the alef-beit, with which You created heaven and earth and all that fills them, and from which You wove Your holy Torah. In the power of speech You have separated man from the animals – and I have not been even as good as an animal, for I have made my mouth impure with disgraceful speech, with slander, lies, sneering, gossip, conflict, by humiliating others and cursing them, by taking pride in another’s disgrace, speaking of business on the Sabbath and the festivals, and by swearing oaths and vows.

You made me hands and the sense of touch, through which to engage with the commandments, and I have made them impure with forbidden touch, with the blows of a vicious fist, by raising my hand to strike another, and by moving set-aside objects on the Sabbath and on festivals.

You made me feet to carry me to all that I am commanded to do – and I have made them impure by hurrying, running toward evil. I feel all my limbs and I find each one flawed; from the soles of my feet to my head, there is no place without blemish. I am too humiliated and ashamed to raise my face toward You, my God, for I have used these limbs and senses with which You have graced me, and the life force You have always emanated to them, to do what is evil in Your eyes and to act against Your will. Alas; and alas for my soul.

I know that there is almost no righteous man on this earth, who does not sin against his fellow man, against his property or person, in actions or in speech, and over this my very heart ails me within, for Yom Kippur does not atone for what one person does to another, until he has appeased him. And for this my heart is broken within me, and my bones shake, for even the day of one’s death cannot atone for such things. And so I lay my plea before You, that You have compassion for me and let me find grace and kindness and compassion in Your eyes, and in the eyes of all my fellow men. I hereby forgive completely and absolutely, anyone who may have sinned against me, by his person or his property, who has spoken slander about me, even one who may have discredited my name, and anyone who has damaged my body or property, and for all the sins that one person commits against another – though without relinquishing my claim to any money I could legally recover, and excluding anyone who has sinned against me saying “I shall sin against him and he will surely forgive me.” With these exceptions, I forgive completely and utterly; let no man be punished for my sake. And just as I forgive every other person, so make me gracious in the eyes of every other, so that they forgive me completely and absolutely.

And now, LORD my God, it is revealed and known before You, that through all my sins and injustices I never intended to anger You or to rebel against You; I simply allowed my evil impulse to guide me, the impulse which always, every day, spreads a net at my feet to trap me. And I am poor and destitute, more a worm than a human being; my strength to stand up to this impulse fails me, and the labor of earning a living, of sustaining my family, and the worries of the time and its events have plagued me. And as all this is revealed and known before You, for there is no righteous person on all this earth who does only what is good and does not sin, so, with Your great compassion, You have given us one day in the year, a great and holy day, this Day of Atonement – may it come to us for the good – to let us repent in Your presence, to atone for all our sins, and be purified of what taints us, as it is written: “For on this day you will be atoned and made pure; of all your sins before the LORD you shall be purified.”

And now, look upon Your nation Israel, the one You have taken as Your own nation; who is like Your nation Israel, who are pure and holy and who long for and wait for Your pardon? We have come before You broken and oppressed at heart, a poor and needy and destitute people, to ask Your pardon, forgiveness and atonement, for all the sins, the wrongs and the rebellions that we have committed before You. We know, LORD, our own evil, and the iniquities of our ancestors. We are too humiliated and ashamed to raise our faces toward You, like the shame of a thief discovered in the act. How then can we open our mouths and lift our heads? In our many injustices we have taken off the holy image that clothed us, and which no demon or accuser can even look upon, as it is written: “All the nations of the earth will see that you are called by the LORD’s name, and they will fear you.” We have exchanged all this for an impure image, we have dressed ourselves in filthy clothes, and now how can we come to the gate of the King, dressed in sackcloth, dirtied with our own filth? We are astonished at our own souls; how can we have done this abhorrent thing? We have taken our own souls and spirits out of the world of holiness and run away to a desert place of thirst and the shadow of death, to a place of the impurity of the broken shells.

And You, LORD our God, who desire the repentance of the wicked, as it is written: “Repent, repent your evil ways; why should you die, O house of Israel?” And as it is said: “Do I desire the wicked man’s death? – so says the LORD God – Do I not desire him to come back from his ways and live?” Now we have taken to heart the wish to repent and to come before You, shamefaced. Our Father, our King, have compassion for us, as a father has compassion for a son who has rebelled against him, who has left his house – and when that son returns shamefaced to his father, weeping and calling out, throwing himself at his feet, it is in a father’s nature to have compassion for him. And if we are slaves, slaves beaten by their master for rebelling against him – behold: we have already been stricken, through our subjugation by governments, bodily sufferings, or with poverty and the distresses of raising children, and other forms of pain. Punish us, LORD, but with judgment; not in Your fury, lest You reduce us to nothing. Have compassion for us and command those of Your holy angels who are responsible for purity, to strip our filthy clothes from us and to purify us of all our sins, as it is written: “Take his filthy clothes from him –” and dress us too in clean garments. And, in the prayer of King David, peace be upon him: “Bring back the joy of Your salvation to me, and support me with a willing spirit.” Create a pure heart in us, God, and place a steadfast spirit within us. And if we have transgressed and rebelled, as is the way of flesh and blood, then follow Your own way – to pardon and forgive. Do not let our sins prevent us returning to You: it is Your way to welcome in those who return. Strengthen our hearts in Your Torah and in awe of You, that Your awe may always be fixed in our hearts. And make our ideas and thoughts pure in readiness for Your service. Witness my heartbreak, for I regret the bad actions I have done thus far, and weep and lament and confess them, and say: I have sinned, I have done wrong, I have rebelled before You. Accept my repentance among that of all Your nation Israel, who return to You with all their hearts, for I too am among the children of Abraham, Isaac and Jacob. Do not let my many sins prevent me from returning wholeheartedly to You. Grant me the merit of returning to You with a perfect heart, regretting all my sins utterly and completely, and leaving all my bad practices behind me eternally. Have compassion for me and save me forever from every sin and iniquity; for were it not for Your compassion and kindness there would be no way to stand up to the evil impulse that burns like fire in my bones. And so, have compassion for me and give me the strength to stand up to my own impulse, as the sages and righteous ones said among their holy words: “One who comes to purify himself is helped along his way.”

I hereby accept the holiness of the Day of Atonement, and take upon myself its five forms of abstinence, as You commanded us at the hand of Moses Your servant in Your holy Torah: abstinence from eating and drinking, washing, anointing, wearing shoes and having marital relations – as well as the obligation to rest from all work on this holy day. Through our abstinence from eating and drinking, atone for us all that we have sinned through forbidden eating and drinking. And through our abstinence from washing and anointing, atone for us all that we have sinned through indulging ourselves on weekdays, and particularly for the forbidden indulgences. And through our abstinence from shoes, atone for us all that we have sinned with these feet that have hurried, running toward evil, and for infringing the twenty-four laws for which a court rules banishment from the community, making us liable to go barefoot like one who has been banished. And through our abstinence from sexual relations, atone for us our sins (and the damage we have done to the holy covenant through the impurity of forbidden emissions and through emitting semen wastefully and for forbidden sexual relations). And through the five prayer services and the supplications and prayers, may we repair the damage we have done with the five articulators of our mouths – the palate, throat, tongue, teeth and lips – from which speech comes, and which I have made impure with forbidden speech and with vows and oaths. And as we embrace and kiss the Torah scroll, and by merit of the prayers that we shall pray on this holy day, may all the prayers that we have prayed this year without full concentration, rise and come and reach and join with them; may they all be included with the prayers of this day, and arrive at Your head to become a crown upon it, with all the other prayers of Israel. And may the tears in my eyes repair all that we have damaged through seeing impure things. And as our bodies burn with the fast and with the prayers, may we repair the burning of our two hundred and forty-eight bones and three hundred and sixty-five sinews in the fire of the evil impulse. And may the depletion of our fat and blood by the fast, atone for all that we have sinned, done wrong and rebelled before You. May this fast be regarded as if it were the offering up of our own bodies upon the altar, and be accepted for a pleasant scent before You, like a sacrifice, an offering.

We know that, according to the [kabbalistic] order of repentance, we are required to afflict ourselves for every single sin, and to torment our bodies in direct balance with the pleasure we enjoyed as we transgressed. But it is revealed and known before You that we have not the strength to torment ourselves even for one sin, to say nothing of every single one, for our sins are too many to count, and our strength fails us. And so may it be Your will, LORD our God, that this fast we perform on this holy day, the Day of Atonement – may it come to us for the good – may be atonement for all our sins.

May it be Your will, God, King who sits upon a throne of compassion, who desires the repentance of the wicked, that You place the love and awe of You into our hearts, and into the hearts of all Your people, the house of Israel, that we may be in awe of You always. And among us, have compassion for the transgressors of Your people, the house of Israel, and place the fear of Your glorious might into their hearts – make their stone hearts humble and let them return to You wholeheartedly, as You promised at the hands of Your prophets, that no outcast would be banished. Though they have done many culpable acts before You, to such a degree that the ways of repentance must surely be locked in their faces – still, in Your great compassion, dig them a tunnel beneath the walls, through to the throne of Your glory, and accept them back in repentance. Have compassion for us, and place within us the strength to serve You always. And remove all the obstacles and constraints that prevent us serving You; for You have formed us, and You know all that is lacking in human beings and their nature, which bewilders them away from Your service; and it is in Your power to remove and to block these things. Do not confound the hour for us – not until we have returned to You wholeheartedly; and let us spend all our days in repentance and good deeds, until the end of the very last moment, when the desire will arise before You to collect our souls in to You. And at that moment, may all our thoughts be bound to Your name, so that our souls will leave us in a state of holiness and purity, and let us then merit to rise from here below, up to the heights, and to emanate plenty to all the worlds, from the heights above to here below. And give us the strength to complete the rites of the fast on this holy day, to perform the fast with all its five forms of abstinence, without our deeds bringing us to fail, Heaven forbid, in any of these five – for all of us are children of Abraham, Isaac and Jacob, Your beloved ones. May we merit to raise our children to Torah and to good actions, and let them not be caught and punished, Heaven forbid, for our sins. And seal us in the book of good lives: lives in awe of Your name; lives in which we will serve You wholeheartedly; lives in which we will not stumble, Heaven forbid, into any sin or iniquity or guilt; lives of sustenance that comes calmly, with dignity, and in lawful ways; and do not let the demands of our livelihoods harry our time, and give us our sustenance in quiet and tranquility, so that our hearts may be free to serve You. Purify our thinking and intentions, so that we may cling to You always.

And so let our prayers rise, come, reach, appear, be favored and heard before You. Accept Your people’s prayer. Strengthen us, purify us, You who are revered. And bring out all those holy sparks that have fallen away into the shell by means of our sins. And through the holiness of this Day of Atonement, may Your attributes be awakened, Your greatness and power and glory and majesty and splendor, for everything in heaven and earth is Yours. Yours, LORD is the kingdom. “Light is sown for the righteous, and for the noble hearted, joy.” Let the holiness of the Day of Atonement be spread out over them, and atone for our actions, as is written in the Torah of Moses Your servant: “For on this day you will be atoned and made pure; of all your sins before the LORD you shall be purified.” “May the pleasantness of the LORD our God be upon us. Establish for us the work of our hands, O establish the work of our hands.” Sweep the rule of arrogance from the earth; rule over all the world in Your honor, and be raised above all the earth in Your glory, and bring gladness to Your land and joy to Your city, and the flourishing of pride to David Your servant.

May the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart find favor before You, LORD, my Rock and Redeemer. Amen – so may it be Your will.

Master of the Universe, before anything else be said – I have no mouth to reply, I have not the boldness to raise my head, for my iniquities are too many to count, my sins are more than can be told, and the burden they form is too much for me to bear. I confess before You, LORD my God – with my head bowed, my body bowed, my strength quelled, my power dulled, my spirit laid low, bowing, prostrate, throwing myself down before You, in fear and in terror, trembling and perspiring, shaking, fearful, awed. I will tell You, LORD my God, only some of my evil actions, my ugly habitual ways, my shameful practices. It is impossible to speak them all, and I have no strength to explain them, I do not command the strength to reveal them, I do not know how to speak them out, I am not worthy to tell them. And to ask forgiveness and pardon and atonement for all these things – who am I? What is my life? I am vanity and emptiness; I am a maggot, a worm; I am dust and ashes. I am ashamed of my sins, humiliated by my transgressions. I have no voice even to confess before You; my iniquity is too great to bear; my transgressions are too heinous to be told; I am ashamed and humiliated, like a thief caught in the act of breaking in.

Master of the Universe, if I were to come forward to lay out all my sins and to explain them – my time would come to an end and the list would not have ended. For which of them should I beg mercy? From which of them should I ask relief? Which ones should I confess? General categories or individual deeds? The hidden sins or those in the open? The earliest or the last? New ones or old? Hidden ones or known? Those that I remember, or those I have forgotten? I myself know that I have no learning and no wisdom, no knowledge or understanding, no righteousness, no nobility and no acts of kindness to my name. I am a fool and know nothing; I am ignorant and do not understand; a thief, not to be trusted, guilty and with no merit, wicked and not righteous, evil and not good. I have performed every kind of vile deed, and have committed vilest iniquities. And were You to judge me as befits my actions – alas, oh, and woe on me, alas to my soul. And were You to seek to cleanse me, as a silversmith purifies and refines silver – then nothing would remain of me at all. For I am like straw before the fire, like dry wood before the furnace – like silver alloy only thinly plating clay; I am empty, utterly empty, without substance.

How should I begin? What healing can I look for? I have been like a stubborn and rebellious son, like a slave rebelling against his master, like a student disputing with his own teacher. I have declared impure the things that You hold pure, and declared pure the things You hold impure. I have prohibited what You allow and allowed what You prohibit. I have hated that which You love, and loved that which You hate. I have been stringent where You are lenient, and lenient where You are stringent. I have distanced what You draw close, and drawn close what You have distanced. But my intention was not to provoke Your anger – and in my brazenness I am coming now to ask for forgiveness before You. My demeanor has been as shameless as a dog’s – I was brazen as a whore – and I come before You now full of shame. It was as it is written: You had the brazen face of a whore, and refused to feel your humiliation.

Master of the Universe, it is not only for myself that I pray and confess, but for myself and for Your congregation who stand before You. And even though I am not worthy and do not merit to confess, even on my own behalf, and certainly not for others – yet, it is Your way to be patient, Your trait to overlook Your fury, Your custom to have compassion for Your creations, and most of all for those who return to You and confess before You, who desert and regret their transgressions and do not hide them. For so it is written: One who hides his transgressions will never succeed, but one who confesses and leaves them will find compassion – and he will save his spirit from the judgment of Gehinnom.

Master of the Universe, the custom of Your righteous court is not the custom of the courts of men. For the way of a person is to bring a claim for payment against his fellow to a court or to a judge – and if that other then denies the claim he is spared the payment, while if he confesses, he is obliged to pay. But Your righteous law court is not so, for there if one denies – alas to him, and alas to his soul. But if he confesses and leaves his sin behind – then You will show him compassion.

Master of the Universe, were it not for our sins and our transgressions we would feel no shame or humiliation, and what, then, would we confess? No one can ask for forgiveness for sin, if he has not sinned. And the power of Your compassion would never be known were it not through Your forgiveness of the sins of those who hold You in awe. And now it is not only for myself that I confess, but for myself and for all Your congregation.

May it be Your will, LORD, our God and God of our ancestors, that You forgive and pardon us for all our iniquities and transgressions, and grant us atonement for all our sins.